Every Christmas, I ask for a single week off to see my family. Every year, my boss says no.

This time, I sent my request in June—six months’ notice, like always. Last week, four coworkers were approved for the same dates.

I wasn’t.

When I asked why, he told me I should “be a team player” since I don’t have kids. I smiled, said “Okay,” and walked away.

Yesterday, he froze when he saw the announcement on the company’s internal board:
A welcome post from another firm, congratulating me on joining their team in January.

No angry email.
No dramatic speech.
Just a quiet, well-timed message that said everything he never bothered to hear.

He called me into his office immediately, bewildered.

“Why the sudden decision?”

Sudden?
My request had been sitting in his inbox for half a year.

I reminded him of that, gently. I told him I respected the team, but fairness mattered. Approving time off for others while denying mine—because I didn’t have children—was not something I could keep accepting.

For the first time, he actually paused. He admitted he’d never realized the request meant so much.

“It wasn’t just the request,” I said. “It was the pattern.”

The truth?
This decision didn’t begin with the holiday schedule. It began years ago, every time I covered shifts, postponed plans, picked up slack, and quietly let everyone else live their lives while mine stayed on hold.

The new company values balance. They encourage early planning. They honor commitments. The difference was blinding.

When I visited my family earlier this year, they said, “You deserve a place that appreciates you.” They were right.

As I left the office after giving notice, an unexpected peace settled in. Later, my boss sent a brief but sincere message wishing me well.

Sometimes change doesn’t come from fighting for scraps.
It comes from choosing a table where you’re valued.

This Christmas, for the first time in years, I’ll be home—really home.
No guilt. No stress. No ignored requests.

And I’m carrying one lesson with me into this next chapter:

Valuing yourself is not selfish.
It’s the first step toward a life where your time matters just as much as your work.