A wife comes home late one night and quietly opens the bedroom door.
Peeking under the blanket, she sees four legs instead of two.

Grabbing a baseball bat, she starts swinging wildly at the bed, then storms into the kitchen to calm herself with a drink.

There she finds her husband, relaxed and reading a magazine.

“Hi, darling,” he says. “Your parents came to visit, so I let them sleep in our bedroom. Did you say hello?”

An old man and his wife are lying in bed. After a few quiet moments, the old man lets out a fart and says,
“Seven points.”

His wife turns and asks, “What on earth are you talking about?”

“I’m playing fart football,” he replies.

A few minutes later, the wife farts. “Touchdown! Tie game.”

Soon after, the old man farts again. “Touchdown! I’m winning 14–7!”

Annoyed, the wife fires back with another fart. “Tie score!”

Determined not to lose, the old man strains hard—but instead of farting, he accidentally poops the bed.

“What was that noise?” the wife asks.

“That,” he says calmly, “was the halftime whistle. Switch sides.”

Hope this made you smile—have a great day!